Endless Love
by Sora Takenouchi Ishida
Summary: A cute Carby fic. Hope you all enjoy.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't know ER or any of its characters. I'm just writing for fun and to find comfort from Carby in this whole lubbyshit and make my faith always increase. If you don't like Carby, don't bother reading. If you expect to see Lubby here, well find another story. This is a cute, sad and romantic Carby fic, with some Lubby scenes I watched on Season 13 but Carby.

**Endless Love**

**Part 1**

The alarm had just bipped. John Carter looked at it. 10 a.m. He rubbed his eyes and groaned a little to wake himself up. He rolled over the bed and pulled the blanket away. He slowly got up and wrapped in his bath robe. Then he tiptoed to the next bedroom. He carefully opened the door and closed it behind him after he entered. He walked over to the furniture standing in the center of the room. He looked at the child sleeping peacefully in the crib with lovely eyes. If there was anything to be proud of, that was it. His child. The baby definitely looked like her. She had the same blond hair, the big and passionate hazel eyes. Lynn was a miniature of his girlfriend. Though they had this baby, they decided not to marry yet. As John remained in his deep thought he was caressing the baby's face and she made a soft noise, as if she was enjoying the touching. He smiled proudly at the sound of being a father, something different for him. Despite Abby's fears to continue the pregnancy he was very understanding with her. Her fears of having a bi-polar child were for nothing. Lynn was just as healthy as they both were. And six months after the birth, she still was the cutest baby he's ever seen. He carefully put his hands around that tiny little body laying on the crib and slowly lifted it. He held her close to his body and began to make soft movies, like he was trying to make her sleep. He couldn't keep his eyes away from her. She was so beautiful… so priceless. He loved this baby very much. He wondered what she dreaming. She looked so calm, so relaxed. And it made him feel calm and relaxed too. John Carter never thought a baby could have such a powerful effect on him. He never quite understood why parents were devastated when their children died at County. Now it makes perfect sense for him. His wife and his daughter were the priceless persons for him. It could take everything… he was willing to do anything to protect them. He walked up to the rocking chair and sat, the baby still in his arms. He began to rock the chair slowly.

'I love you my baby. You're my jewel. You're so tiny and fragile. So beautiful. I love you already.' He thought to himself.

Just then he noticed he had to meet Abby at County. Having this close moment with their daughter made him lost the sense of time. He slowly stood up and gently put her back down in the crib. She looked so peaceful in the pink soft clothes. Abby has changed after the baby's arrival. She turned to be more vain, more careful, more protective. She pretty much liked the thought of a new baby at home. So did he. The baby brought them closer, and he liked it. If it were up only for him, they would be bunches of kids then, so they could always be close. John could spend the rest of his life staring at his baby daughter and never get enough of it. But he and Abby had planned to meet at County to eat out and have a precious, memorable time with each other and Lynn.

John stood from the rocking chair, still holding the baby carefully and tightly against his chest. She coughed softly and he smiled a little. These simple and normal things were the ones who made him more proud of being a father. He slowly and carefully put her in the baby carriage and then moved towards the closed, trying not to wake Lynn. He picked the baby's bag and filled it with some items she would need while he waited for Abby. Then he turned around again and guided the baby carriage out of the house. As he was walking down the street to County, some women said 'What a beautiful baby' and staff. There were some women that teased him, and for that he only raised his hand and showed them his ring. He surprised himself noticing it was something that came out naturally all the time women teased him. Abby gets jealous when it comes to these things, but she trusts him.

He continued walking down to County as Lynn lay asleep in the baby carriage. Soon he walked into County and was greeted by Chuny and Lily.

"Hey Carter." Chuny and Lily walked up to him.

"Hey"

"Oh my God, she's truly beautiful. An angel."

John smiled proudly and happily.

"She definitely looks like Abby."

"That's good, right?"

"Yes. Yes. Of course!"

"Is Abby around?"

"She's in Trauma 2."

"Thanks."

He headed to Trauma Two, but bumped into Susan in the way.

"Hey Carter."

"Hi."

"How's my niece?", Susan said as she bent down to see Lynn.

"She's great. She's great."

"Oh she's sleeping so peacefully."

"Yeah. Can you take care of her while I talk to Abby?"

"Sure."

"Thanks."

Again he began to made his way to find his girlfriend. He walked in Trauma Two. She walked towards the door when she heard it open.

"Hi", Abby said cheerly.

"Hi."

They kiss hello.

She looked at her watch.

"You came early."

"Yeah, I couldn't stay away from you", He brushed some strands of her hair to her ear.

She smiled happily.

"Not now. Not here okay?", She put her hand over his and dropped his thoughts.

"Okay. Maybe we – I mean, you – could take a break."

"John"

"Okay. Okay."

"Did you leave Lynn with the nanny?"

"Nope."

"What? You brought her in?"

"Wasn't I supposed to?"

"Of course not! This place is filled with germs and virus."

"And?"

"She can get sick."

"You're talking crazy."

"Talking crazy? I'm sorry if I want to protect _my_ baby!"

"_Our_ baby, Abby."

"You know, I can't deal with this right now"

She stormed off and slammed the door behind her.

I threw my head back in frustration and followed her.

"Abby… come on."

"Stop it Jonathan! I don't want to talk right now! I've got patients to take care of!"

_Jonathan? Did she just call me Jonathan?_, He thought.

She was mad at him and he was getting mad at her either.

"Hey Lockhart. Wait!", He grabbed her by the arm, "Wait!"

"No!"

"Hey! Why are you two yelling?", Kerry interrupted.

"Nothing. Sorry Kerry."

"You two are disturbing the people here. If you want to fight, go outside."

"Sorry", They both said.

Abby grabbed a chart and went to see a patient. John watched her but walked out from County.

Hours passed by and his shift ended. He signed out and headed home.

He arrived home and Abby was laying asleep on the couch. He stared at her for several minutes, amused by her peaceful sleep. He wondered what she was dreaming about. He knelt down next to her and caressed her face with the back of his hand. The warmth of it made her tremble a little. He smiled at this gesture.

He hated when they fought. Usually, they fought over stupid things, like the last one. They fought over their child's health. In front of many patients, at County. He felt so ashamed arguing about family in public.

The warmth of his hand woke up. She opened her eyes and stared at him. He was looking at her with passionate eyes.

"I'm sorry…"

"It's okay", She touched the back of his hand, "It's okay."

He smiled at her and knew everything would be okay. He touched her cheek and smiled wider.

"I know."


	2. Chapter 2

**Part 2:**

He took her hand and made her stand up. He slipped his hands down to her waist and she slipped hers over his arms.

"I'm sorry… about earlier. I didn't want to start a discussion with you and not even piss you", He caressed her face softly.

"Did you hear what I said? I just said it's okay John. I don't know why you keep insisting on it."

"I felt bad Abby. That's all." He looked down at her. "And I was kinda hoping you'd forgive me".

He smiled sweetly.

"I already forgave you. I wasn't really mad at you. I can't be mad at you", She looked up at him, "You always find a way to approach me, a way that breaks me down… everytime."

She smiled happily and kindly and he smiled happily and kindly back to her.

"And then…", She added, "Somehow we end being like this. You and me. Alone. In each other's arms."

He smiled as he heard her talking and noticing the powerful effect he had on her. He pulled her closer.

She opened her mouth but no words came out. He lifted his hand and put his index finger on her mouth. When he knew she was relaxed, he leaned down and met her lips with his own in a deep, passionate, long kiss.

They were caught in that kiss for several long minutes. Their head moving slowly and so their tongues. Minutes after such closeness, they pulled away from each other.

He was holding her hand on his and spun her around. She now had her back to her, and he wrapped his arms around her waist from behind. Still holding her closer to him, he guided her to their bedroom.

He spun her around once again and she was facing him now. He leaned over again and kissed her tenderly. She kissed him back just as tenderly as he kissed her. They pulled away. But the urge to feel each other's skin made them pull back and they kissed again. And again. And again. And another time.

The next thing they knew, she was lying on the bed beneath him, still kissing. He reached for her shirt and lifted it over her head. They pulled away from each other so he could take it completely off. Then they went back on kissing, but soon something disturbed them.

The phone.

She made a face but reached over to answer it.

"Hello?", She whispered.

"Abby? Am I interrupted something?"

_Damn it_, She thought.

"Hi mom. No, you're not." She looked up at John.

"Just called to see how's everything"

"Yeah, it's... great. Great."

"Good. So how's the baby? And John?"

"They're great. Fine."

She looked at him once more.

"Listen mom, I gotta go. You just called in a bad time. I was teaching John how to change Lynn's diapers."

Maggie laughed on the other side.

"Okay. Okay. I'll let you two take care of the baby."

"Bye mom."

"Bye Abby."

"Change Lynn's diapers?", He asked as she hang up the phone.

"Yeah, it was the first thing that came into my mind." She smiled.

He smiled back at her.

"Where did we stopped?"

She looked down to her breasts.

"Ohhh I know", He said a little proudly.

Just after that, he led his month to hers and kissed her passionately.

She jerked his tie away from his neck and then started unbuttoning his shirt. Then she slipped it off him and tossed it over the floor.

But when things got hotter once again, something disturbed them

The phone, again.

He dropped his head down in frustration as she reached over the phone to answer it.

"Hello?"

"May I speak to John please?"

"Hold on a second." She lowered the phone. "It's for you."

He looked at her with a who-the-hell-decided-to-call-me-right-now look and reached for the phone.

"Hello?", He almost shouted.

"John?"

"Gamma? Hi."

"John, I wanted you to -"

"Gamma," He interrupted, "Can't you wait till the morning? I was a little busy right now."

"It's very important."

"Okay. Go ahead", He rolled onto his side.

He was mad. Abby knew it. And she regretted answering the phone.

"I'm throwing a charity event in New York three months from now. And I would like you to come."

"Gamma", He stroke his hair, "I don't know. I told you I don't wanna get involved."

"I still want you to go. Then I can see my great granddaughter."

"Gamma."

John looked at Abby, who rolled over and turned her back to him.

She was hurt, he knew that. He rolled his eyes.

"Gamma, I gotta go. Abby is showering the baby and I don't want to miss it."

"Okay. Take care. Bye."

"Bye."

He hang up the phone and spoke to her as he slid closer.

"Gamma wan-"

"I know." She interrupted.

"And I want you to go with me."

"I don't know."

"What?"

The pain was still fresh for her. Too recent.

She stood silent.

"Why Abby?"

"Do you remember what happened last time?"

She bit her lower lip and waited for an answer.

He shook his head, signalizing he did.

"Yes."

"We argued and then you left me alone, standing there hurt. You just drove off to McNulty's. And you never came back. I had to hail a taxi to get home."

Her body began to shake and there were chokes on her voice.

He began to blame himself for leaving her there alone.

"I'm sorry." He slid closer to her and wrapped his arms around her.

"You know, being sorry sometimes just isn't enough", She said harshly but calmed herself. "Everything we do now has to be well-thought. We have a baby now. Everything is for her."

"I know Abby."

"It's just... these events scare me you know? Everytime your gamma makes an event, we end up fighting and hurting each other. Don't wanna keep doing this. It's just not good at all."

He could feel fear on her voice and it concerned him.

"I know. I don't wanna keep doing this either. I care about you... a lot. Don't wanna give up on you... never."

"I just don't want to feel afraid of going to charity events. It's a really good cause. And I want to get involved too... if you want me too."

"You sure that's want you want?"

"Yeah. I mean, only if you're doing it too."

"I'm not sure then. You may have convinced me."

He slid away and moved to kiss the back of her neck. She smiled and trembled. Then she rolled over so she could take a better look of him.

She couldn't help but taking a peek from his bare chest. At the same time, he stole a glance from her soft breasts and he aimed for them.

He leaned down and kissed them. She just watched him touching her. She was enjoying. He knew that when he looked at her.

He continued kissing her body until his lips reached hers, and they met in a deep, long kiss.

He reached over her back and opened the bra, revealing her breasts completely. He cupped her face with his hands and lowered his head down to hers.

An hour later, they were laying side by side, breathing deeply. Just then, Abby remembered something. She just stood up from the bed, wrapped herself on a robe and walked out of the bedroom.

He stood distracted for a while then followed her. He stopped when he saw her at Lynn's room.

She was holding her tightly against her body and was rocking her carefully. He stood amazingly at her. She always surprised him.

He enjoyed the thought of them being a family. He wanted for so long to have a family – a real family. And now he's finally got what he wanted. He felt so happy. He wanted to spread joy all over the world.

Abby suddenly looked around and saw him staring at them leaned against the door, smiling happily.

"Come on John. Don't feel ashamed." She said playfully.

He approached her and looked at the baby in her arms.

"She's so beautiful, isn't she?"

"She's just as beautiful as her mother", He said looking at Abby.

She smiled proudly. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her cheek.

"I'm not lying here. She looks just like you Abby."

"John."

"She does. Really."

Right after that, Lynn woke up.

"Hello little girl. Did you have a peaceful sleep?"

She just stretched her little arms and made a soft noise. Both Abby and John smiled at her.

"How does it feel being a father like huh?"

"It's the best feeling ever. I would never ask for anything else." He said as he played with her tiny little fingers.

"And how does it feel being a mother?

"Something I never thought about doing again. But I did. For you."

He smiled at the thought of influencing her. He was very proud of himself.

"I'm glad you did. She's so cute. I love her already."

"Yes she is. I love her too."

Abby stretched her arms.

"Hold her."

He stretched his arms and took the little baby on them. Then he smiled having her so close to him. Abby stared proudly at the smiling father and the sleepy daughter.


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3:**

Two and a half months later. The charity event was in fifteen days. Abby was holding something in her hands. She was sitting on the toilet vase staring it it. She didn't know whether she was happy or not.

_Damn it_, was what she thought.

But then she thought about Lynn and that made her smile widely. Well, she was happy.

_Wait till John know. He will flip._

She smiled even wider as she pictured his reaction when she'd tell him.

Abby worked the rest of her shift with a smile upon her face. Everybody questioned if something happened to her, cause they hadn't seen her smile like that in a long time.

But she kept changing the subject, saying it was nothing interesting. She was just happy, that's all.

Later, her happiness was replaced by worry. The thought of the charity event coming over was startling her. She couldn't help but feel nervous about the charity's bad lucky. When they fought everytime there was an event his Gamma planned.

She rushed to get home. He said he would pick her up at 8, so they could have a fancy dinner and then see a movie.

She was glad they were spending some time together. Their schedules weren't allowing them to see each other, so they seized every opportunity they had.

Abby felt like she was floating. She was completely happy. She arrived home and quickly went to shower. Then she wrapped herself in the robe and went to her bedroom.

Susan was gonna take care of Lynn while they were out of town. She opened the wardrobe and picked a long lavender dress.

Abby moved to see herself in the mirror. She put the dress in front of her and placed her hand on her belly. In few minutes she would be telling John the big news.

She slipped off the robe and slipped on the dress. Again, she placed her hand on her growing belly and smiled a little.

Just then Lynn started crying. Abby picked her in her arms and rocked her gently and softly.

"Are you hungry honey?"

Abby sat on the bed and slipped down the dress just enough to reveal her breasts. She pulled Lynn closer to breastfeed her.

She always felt a warm feeling when she was breastfeeding Lynn. Like a connection or something.

Suddenly she looked up towards the door and saw John leaned against the door frame, staring at them.

"Hi", She said softly, "How long have you been there?"

"Not long enough."

"Well, don't be shy. Come here." She tapped on the bed, next to her.

He came closer to Abby and Lynn.

He watched as she fed the baby and he couldn't help but smile. He was beginning to understand what happiness meant.

He began to play with Lynn's tiny little hand and felt his body shiver from her soft touch.

Abby looked at his hand and smiled proudly.

"I don't want to leave her."

"Me too."

"You think Susan will take care of her? I mean, proper care?"

"We can trust her." He looked at her.

"John, I can't leave her. What if something happens? Or someone breaks through her place?"

"Abby. She's still here. You can't worry over something you don't even know if will happen."

"But she's just a baby. I wouldn't forgive myself if something happens to her." She was nearly to tears now.

He moved closer to her and wrapped his arms around her.

"Let's not worry about it okay?"

Her fears were his fears.

"I'll struggle to protect you and Lynn. My family. Nothing will come closer to you both if I'm here."

Abby smiled. That comfort her a little.

"I know."

She looked down to Lynn and noticed she had just fallen asleep. So she moved her away from her body and stood up to put her back on the crib.

John remained sitting on the bed, never taking his eyes of her. Abby picked the baby's bag and filled it with her things. Her eyes filled with tears as she put the things on the bag. She cried silently, she didn't want him to hear it.

Too late.

"What's it?", He came behind her and put his lips on her neck.

"Nothing", She sobbed.

"Come on Abby. She will be okay. Let's try for once."

She sighed deeply.

"Okay."

"Good."

"I'll be downstairs in few minutes, if you want to wait in the limo."

"Sure. Take your time."

Once she was sure he left, she ran to the bathroom and closed the door. Then she leaned against it and slipped till the floor. And then she cried.

She stood up when she heard the driver hurrying her. She re-put her make up again and picked the baby and her belongings.

They quickly arrived at Susan's. Abby was explaining to her all the things she should know but had to go soon. John was telling her they would be late.

"Come on Abby, we have to go."

"Okay. Bye Susan". She caressed Lynn's face. "Mommy loves you."

"Daddy loves you too sweetie. Please be nice okay?"

They got in the limo again and the driver sped off. Abby looked through the back window, to take a last look at Lynn. It broke her heart.

John was staring at her and reached for her hand.

"It's okay. She will be just fine."

Abby didn't answer. Her mind was beginning to be drifted over something else. The big news.

"Yeah, I hope so."

For the last half an hour, Abby tried to find words to tell him she was carrying a baby again.

Questions like, how would he react, is this what I really want kept running and running over her head. It started to scare her.

"John"

"What?"

"Hmmm... how long is gonna take to arrive in Atlanta?"

_Shit, yeah okay. This wasn't the right time._

"I don't know."

She nodded her head and looked away.

They were a little distant today. Like they were strangers or something. That didn't please him. He preferred when they were closer. When he had her in her arms. Something wasn't working tonight.

"What is it that you're keeping away from me?", He inquired.

"What?"

"You weren't going to ask me about the time we would arrive to Atlanta."

"Excuse me?"

"Abby, I know you way too well. I can tell you're hiding something. What is it?"

"Well, mister know-it-all, I'm not hiding anything"

"Tell me."

"I don't have anything to tell you!"

"Right."

He bit his lower lip and looked away.

"John."

"Don't worry Abby."

They didn't talk the rest of the ride. When they arrived at the airport, he helped her getting off the car. She seized the opportunity to lace her hand with his, though she felt kinda bad about it.

"John... let's talk."

"No. You said there was nothing to talk about."

"Well, not at that time. But I don't like it when we don't talk."

He let go of her hand and went to the bathroom.

"Right." He said as he walked away.

Abby looked at him for a while before moving to sit on a chair.

A few minutes later, he came back.

_Last call for flight 598 to Atlanta. Gate 6._

The woman announced.

John looked down to Abby.

"Come on. It's our flight.

"John", She reached for his hand.

"What is it?"

"I'm sorry about earlier. I do have something to tell you."

"Go ahead."

"I'm pregnant."


	4. Chapter 4

**Part 4:**

"You're what?"

"Okay, judging by your face, you don't want it right?" She asked in a sad tone.

"No. No. I do. I do. I'm sorry. Let's just start over. What were you saying?"

"I was saying I'm pregnant."

"This is so amazing!"

He ran to her and picked her in his arms. Then he held her tight and spun her around.

"I knew you weren't serious before."

He stopped spinning her around, but still held her in his arms. Her feet weren't touching the ground.

"I wasn't thinking straight. I'm so happy."

He hugged her. She whispered in his ear.

"I'm sorry about earlier."

"Nah, let's just forget about it."

"Okay."

He put her back on the floor and reached for her hand.

"Come on. We're gonna be late."

Abby couldn't control her smile. The thought of another baby was priceless for her. A baby was something they both wanted. Well, at least she thought he wanted.

John, on the other hand, was planning things for the new baby. The new room, the new furnitures, the paintings on the wall. He wanted a second child, he just didn't expect it to be so soon. He was still enjoying having Lynn.

Abby looked up at him.

"What are you thinking?"

"Nothing really."

"Nothing?"

"Hmm, I'm thinking about future."

"Future?"

"Yeah, how things will be like."

"Oh, you're planning your future?"

"Not mine – _our_."

"Oh good."

"Don't you want to know what I planned?"

"Sure."

"Well, we would have a house on the beach and one in the country. We would have a dog, with a bell over its neck so we could hear when it was around."

Abby smiled.

"Sounds nice."

"Then we would rent a bigger house here in Chicago. The kids would go to the best school around here. I wanna make sure they get the best education they can have."

"Good."

"And I would take less shifts so I could spend more time with my family." He said proudly.

"John." Abby was speechless. She tried to find words, but no one would describe how she felt.

She even considered saying those three words, the magic words every person in love would like to hear.

But she was afraid he wouldn't feel the same, so she just kept it inside of her.

They soon got into the plane. The fact of leaving Lynn was growing inside of her. Being apart from the children was something she would have to get used to.

He stared at her as she looked away through the window.

"What is it?"

She shook her head.

"What?"

"You seem lost. What happened?"

"Oh...", She placed her hand on her belly.

She was thinking about how weird he reacted towards her huge news. She was pregnant, it wasn't something common. Well, it was. But it should be celebrated with happiness, and that wasn't what he really did. He was happy and all, but he seemed distracted to her.

She looked down to the place where their new baby was laying.

"You may think I'm not happy with the big news."

"No, I..."

"I am. Really. I'm just concerned about a few things."

"What things?"

"Well, you know. Gamma keeps insisting on me to get involved with the foundation. I told her like million times I don't want to."

"Then don't. You do what you feel like doing."

"I want to be a doctor. I'm happy where I am. I've got a great job position, I've got a family. That's what matters right?"

"Yeah. It is."

He lifted his hand and put it on her belly. A smile began to rise on his lips. He was finally getting the fact of having a new baby.

"Oh Abby. I'm so proud. Proud of you. Of Lynn. Of our new baby. My life is great."

"I know. So is mine."

She shivered as he ran his hand over her belly.

"Did you pictured me as the mother of your kids?"

"Yes. Since when I asked you to be my sponsor. I knew you were the one."

"I knew."

"I can't live without you. Well, not anymore."

"I know. I can't either."

She reached for his free hand and held it on hers.

"I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend. A better father for my children."

"Abby. You're all I've ever wanted."

"Same here."

She rested her head on his chest and quickly fell asleep. His hand still was resting on her belly.

Hours later, they landed in Atlanta.

"I can't believe I'm actually in Atlanta."

"Yeah. You want to go to the hotel? Or take a walk?"

"Aren't we just in time for the charity event?"

He looked at his watch.

"Yeah." He said in disappointment.

"Sorry."

"Nah, it's okay. We'll have time for that later."

They headed over the hotel where they quickly unpacked.

Abby went to the bedroom to pick some clothes for shower. Then she went to the bathroom and removed her clothes. She turned on the water and stepped in.

The sound of the water made him look towards the bathroom. The door was open, so he could see her shadow from the box. He considered joining her. He took a small box from his bag and opened it. He looked at the two tiny round golden things inside it.

He wondered if that was the right time for that. He wasn't sure about how he felt. If it was strong enough to do it. He didn't even know how she felt. Well, they were together but still. He put the box back on the bag. He would think about it later.

Abby stepped out of the shower and wrapped herself in a towel. She passed by the hall and took a glance at him in the room. She mentally tried to invite him to come over the bedroom. But he just stared at her.

She turned her back from him and went to the bedroom. She closed the door behind her, and leaned against it. And on the other side, he did the same.

She could feel his breaths.

"John?"

"Yeah."

"What happened to us?"

"I don't know."

"You still want to do it?"

"Depends on what you're talking about, yes."

"Well, I don't."

"See, we weren't thinking about the same thing."

"Why can't we talk?"

"Aren't we talking now?"

"You know, your month is moving. But I have no idea what you trying to say." She sighed deeply. "Why aren't you happy with my pregnancy? I thought you wanted it."

She stepped away from the door and opened it.

They stared at each other.

"I am. I am."

"Then you don't you show it?"

"I'm sorry. My mind is racing over something else. Sorry."

"That scares me. You know it."

"I know. I know."

He pulled her closer to him and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Don't do that again..._ please_." She sighed deeply against his chest.

"I won't. I promise."


	5. Chapter 5

**Part 5:**

She pulled away from him and looked at him.

"Don't scare me again okay?"

"I know. I won't."

He caressed her back. She trembled from his touch.

"Can we call Susan? I want to know how's Lynn doing."

"Sure."

John could feel nothing but terrified. Actually terrified. This moment was deep and sad. It startled him just the thought of what she could ask him.

"Susan? Hey, it's Abby." Pause. "Yeah, we're fine." Pause. "No, we're going right now." Pause. "Everything's fine." Pause. "Is Lynn doing great?". Pause. "Sorry to drop her there." Pause. "Yeah, okay then. I have to go now. Tell Lynn I love her. Bye."

"Is she okay?", John asked when Abby hang up the phone.

"Yes."

Abby had a teary tone in her voice. Her eyes filled with water. John was concerned by that. He pulled her closer to him.

"I miss her John."

"I know."

There was a brief silence.

"I miss her too."

Abby pulled away and stared at his hazel eyes.

He looked down to her with passionate eyes.

Words weren't needed to be said. They could read each other's eyes so well.

He leaned towards her and kissed her red lips.

If kissing her would make her forget about everything, he would never part his lips from hers.

She always relaxed when he had his lips on hers. He was her escape from the world. The person she would run to when things get tough.

Once again, he considered telling her he was in love with her. Fear overwhelmed him once again. Fear of not being loved back. Fear of her dumping him. Fear of her telling him he was only saying because of Lynn. Fear of feeling that wouldn't be right.

But he was sure he wanted her. Only her.

He gently laid her down on the bed and kissed her softly. She quickly pulled him away.

"John... we're gonna be late."

"I don't care." He said next to her mouth.

He touched her lips again. She didn't try to stop him. Instead, she slipped her arms around his neck. She just wanted to feel safe. She wanted to feel safe in his arms.

He reached over and started unbuttoning her blouse. He slipped it off her arms and threw it on the floor. He never took his eyes away from her. Then he glanced at her growing belly and smiled. And for the first time since she told him about it, she felt happy and relieved.

He leaned down and kissed the place where the baby was. Abby smiled with happiness. Tears filled her eyes.

"We should marry." He said suddenly, just after he pulled his lips away from her skin.

"What?"

She was startled.

"We should marry."

"I get it. But why?"

"Well we're - "

"Only because we're having another baby? What if it doesn't feel right?"

"We can't be sure, can we?"

"No, but still."

"What?"

"I don't want it to be like a big rush. Something to regret later."

"You think you'll regret it?"

"No, that's not what I meant."

"I'm pretty sure it is."

"John!"

"Unless you don't want to. Just tell me."

"That's not it!"

"Then what is it?"

"Nothing."

"Tell me."

She pushed him away.

"Nothing."

"Then why are you afraid?"

"I'm not afraid."

"So why you don't want to marry me?"

"I don't want this to be so sudden. Like a flip or something. It's a very important decision."

"I know. And I want it."

"Well, I don't."

"I see."

"That's not what you think."

"So now you can read my mind?"

"Yes!" She was pissed. "Look, I'm not ready okay? I wish I was, but I'm not."

"Okay."

"John... _please_."

"I got it Abby."

"Please John." She grabbed his arm. She was shaking. "Let's not do this. Please don't this. You know how terrified of fighting before a charity date I am."

Her eyes were full of tears. His heart melted.

"I know. I know." He couldn't control himself and began caressing her hair.

"I get scary just to think about we can break up after a fight." She cried.

"That won't happen. I promise you."

"Really?" She looked at him with worried eyes.

"Really." The back of his hand was caressing her face.

"Good." She leaned against his chest.

Both of them exhaled in relieved and cried out in frustration.

"I hate when we do this."

"I know, me too."

"Is this even going to stop sometime?"

"I hope so."

"So do I."

She leaned back and stared at his eyes.

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine."

"Marrying sounds so familiar to me. I don't want us to be a failure."

"It won't be."

"Who can you be so sure?"

"Cause we've been together for three years. If it were going to be a failure, it should have been before."

"Yeah."

"No need to be worried."

"I know."

"Ok. Let's go. We're running late."

"Yeah."

Abby opened her bag and took off a long lavender dress.

"You bought a new dress?"

"Yeah" She replied shyly.

"You got all red."

"I did not."

"Yes you did."

"Nooo"

"You're blushing again."

"Well, I felt embarrassed."

"Why? I bet this dress will be perfect on you."

"You're lying." She teased.

She was relaxed again.

"Thank you."

"What for?"

"For everything."

"Nah, don't thank me." He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her.

He lifted her hair and kissed the back of her neck.

"John", She whispered.

"Hmmm", He said against her skin.

"Don't ever leave me."


	6. Chapter 6

**Part 6:**

He closed his eyes and replied softly and confidently.

"I won't. I won't."

She stood silent.

"If you promise me the same."

"I do. I do."

He smiled mischievously.

She turned to face him.

He looked down at her. His hands around her waist. Hers around his neck.

"What you thinking?"

"Nothing."

She just looked at him. She could read him way too well.

"We should be going. We're late."

He released his hands from her. But he didn't take his eyes away from her.

"What?"

"I'm just looking at you."

She smiled.

"How pretty you be with this dress."

"Don't feel too excited."

"I'm not."

"Don't get turned on!"

"Ah, that'd be hard."

She blushed.

"I'm turned on. Since when I talked about marriage with you."

She didn't answer. She tried to avoid the subject.

"Let's go John. Your grandma should be wondering where you are."

"Yeah."

They left the hotel and got in the limo. They quickly arrived at the place where they charity ball was happening.

There were a lot of photographers there. They were registering everything and everyone.

Suddenly John had an idea.

"Wait here."

He went to talk to one of the photographers. He came back some minutes later.

"What?"

"I talked to them. And they agreed to take some photos of us."

"What? John."

"Come on Abby. Our first pictures with the new baby."

Abby smiled. She was glad – and lucky – to have him.

"Okay. Okay."

He smiled at her and she smiled back. They walked towards the photographer.

"You can start taking them now."

John knelt down and kissed Abby's belly as she caressed his hair. Happiness overwhelmed her. The photographer took the picture.

Then he stood and reached for her hand. The other one he placed on her belly and smiled proudly. Again the photographer took a picture.

"John, Lynn's not here."

"Yeah, we should stop now."

"Yeah, we can take more in Chicago."

"It's okay. Stop now."

The photographer put the camera down. John looked at Abby and smiled widely.

"Another one only."

He pulled her towards him and leaned her in his arms. Then signaled for the man to take the picture and turned to face her. Then he leaned down and kissed her, like a cinematographic kiss, with the public and stuff.

After some minutes he peeled his lips away from hers and brought her back again.

"Thank you." John said to the photographer.

Abby was ecstatic. She had no idea he was going to do it. And in public. Her face went red. But she was happy with that gesture.

She looked at him and couldn't control her smile. She was absorbing what just happened. It seemed magical, unique, incredible.

"I can't believe you did that!"

"Well, I wanted to surprise you."

"Embarrass you mean."

"You felt embarrassed?"

"Well, a little."

"But you were surprised?"

"Oh yeah."

"Good."

He reached for her hand and took it. They walked inside.

"John."

"Hi Gamma."

"Hi Miss Carter."

"Hello darling." She turned to John. "I'm so glad you came."

"I'm gonna go get something to eat."

Abby walked away. John thought about following her.

"You could have been more friendly."

"I don't like her."

"Why Gamma? She didn't do anything to you."

"She did to you."

"What?"

"She got pregnant to steal our money."

"Abby isn't like that."

"How can you know?"

"I know. I've been with her for three years. I know her. And I know she's not like that."

"Right."

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, but she's not."

"Okay." She walked away.

Abby was watching them next to the table. She carefully walked to him, afraid of his reaction.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, sure." He turned to her, "You?"

"Yeah, I am. I mean, it's not that I didn't expect that but..."

"I know."

"But I'm fine."

"I'm sorry."

"Hey, it's fine."

"No, it's not."

"John." Abby said harshly but kindly.

"Yeah, okay."

"Good." She looked at him for a while. "I have to call Susan and see how's Lynn doing."

She stepped away again and he watched her.

"Hi Susan. It's Abby."

Pause.

"Great. Great. Listen, I called to see how's Lynn."

Pause.

"Sure."

Pause.

"Hi baby girl, how are you? Mommy's missing you."

Pause. Abby's eyes were full of water.

"Lynn, mommy has to go. Be a good girl to auntie Susan okay? Mommy loves you. Bye."

Abby looked at the cellphone on her hand and tears fell from her eyes. John came behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I just..." She sniffled, "I want to go to the hotel."

"Yeah, me too." He rested his chin on her shoulder. "Let me just say goodbye to Gamma first."

He released his arms of her and started looking for his Gamma.

"John." She waved to him.

"Gamma, Abby and I are leaving. I just wanted to say goodbye."

"She really dominates you."

"What? Gamma, I told you this gotta stop. I love her. She's not like this. You don't have the right to judge her like you are. You don't know her. Now she's waiting for me. Bye."

He turned and walked to Abby. He kept walking despite Gamma's protests.


End file.
